“There is no grief like the grief that does not speak”

I realize that my posts on this blog are primarily cheerful ones, 

but life is not always easy or joyful,
so this post is one with an undercurrent of sorrow.

This weekend J [bro-in-law] & I got memorial tattoos for someone dear to us ['M'] that died in a tragic car accident this winter. M was my first love, the absolute love of my life & also J's cousin and dearest friend.   

This tragedy was the hardest I have ever had to face. 

Words cannot describe my sorrow.

J & I have felt we wanted to pay tribute to M in many ways, one of which was to get tattoos that we know he would love, & that are special reminders of all the joy & love M gave us.

The experience of getting my tattoo, & watching J get his was very emotional for me, & I will always cherish the memory :)

M- I miss you terribly. I will always love you. 

You will forever hold my heart & complete my soul...

This was for you:

My tattoo is a portion of a beautiful story that M wrote for me in high school, 

which I had translated into dutch. M was a proud Dutch :)

J's was a windmill built by his family with the [Dutch] words from M's headstone.

J's is still unfinished...so I will post an update after his next 3 hour torture session ;)

Without J&J, I never would have made it through the last 5 months. 

It has been the most painful time of my life.

I love you guys.

Thank you.

"Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, 

love leaves a memory no one can steal"